Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
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