Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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