I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
