They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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