There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
