Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
