she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
