Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
