bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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