Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
