Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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