I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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