Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
