It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I need water and some morals
Randomize
