no, he came in my armpit
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize