I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize
