Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
