We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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