it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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