erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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