No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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