Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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