Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I want a musical about memes.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize