I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
he shaved USA in his pubs
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
