I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
