honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
