you guys were way drunker than both of me
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
