If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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