i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
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