I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Randomize