Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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