I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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