Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
We are all done wearing pants today
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize