We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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