The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
