the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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