My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
