You really coming over, don't trick.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize