Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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