My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
