I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
