ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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