Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Barsexuality is the new black.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
