She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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