Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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