i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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