do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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