We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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