I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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