There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
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