you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
