everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
